I was recently hit up on Twitter by a guy who ‘retweeted’ a message by a chick who was watching a special on television about the porn business. She basically stated that b/c she was “tired of making ends meet off $450″ (didn’t specify the frequency), she might go that route.
I think that the porn twinklets (remember…people who do porn could never be a star *smile) who defend the business via talk show, blog entries, various events/appearances and now, through twitter often provide a skewed representation of what it’s really all about. I just read a tweet that Toya (from Bullshit Entertainment Television’s, Tiny & Toya) wrote and it kinda goes with what I’m about to share:
Yes, I know…quoting ANYTHING from anybody on BET COULD ruin my rep (LOL) but hear/read me out. I don’t care how much a woman tells you that they’re cool with working in porn. I’ve been around enough girls who worked it to know that they’re lying. Many of them tend to present themselves as oversexed beings to validate their reason for doing movies in the first place. What I found during my time in the valley is that…as long as I was content just like them, they wanted to be my best friend. But the minute I started to distance myself and voice a lot of the issues that I felt were running abound in the game, rumors started and I was suddenly a mouthy bitch. During that time in my life, I was very unhappy…I remember writing SEVERAL blogs and making several calls telling folks how happy I was but inside, I was hurting. I wanted one of my friends to ask me “What in the hell is wrong with you? What are you doing?” I can count on a hand who did. Anyway, back to them…no matter what they say, they’re not happy. But they put on this front to hide the fact that they’re afraid that if they DO let it go, they won’t be able to do anything else. THAT is fact and here are a few more for the wayward souls who even think about it:
FACT: Black girls (hell, black ‘actors’ PERIOD) are NOT paid anywhere NEAR what their ‘other’ peers are paid.
FACT: YES, people in the industry are tested more often than the average bear but bacterial infections and other things of the like are still rampant.
FACT: Many people in the industry WILL give you a fake test (and several production companies would go for it).
FACT: They do NOT test for things like herpes (I’ve even had a ‘nurse’ tell me that if they did that “more than half the industry would be out of a job”)
FACT: MANY (not ALL) “medicate” to get by.
And now a question…do you really think any of that is worth it? I get sick and tired of people believing that people in porn have it easy. As with any ‘job,’ it is absolutely not always silver and gold. But it’s glamorized because the people who work in it and run the companies want people in society to be comfortable enough with it that they turn a blind eye to the bullshit that it contains. I can’t speak on the men b/c IMO, the men who work in porn do it b/c A. they probably wouldn’t get pussy otherwise and B. they probably won’t face the same backlash as a woman would. It’s a win/win type situation for them for the most part.
I stopped debating with women who worked the industry a long time ago b/c it proved to be pointless. They have their beliefs and I most certainly have mine. I do not watch porn, I don’t talk to ANYBODY that I met while in it (except for the girls who I HELPED influence to get out and change their ways knowing everything that I know from just sitting around and lending an ear), and I’ll never allow it in my house.
I don’t judge those that choose to watch it. They weren’t in it. I don’t get ‘angry’ at those who judge me. God forgave me. I’m good. But I also feel that it would be extremely socially irresponsible of me if I didn’t at least speak my mind on the ills of the porn industry, knowing what potential pitfalls someone would open themselves up to.
To the lost soul singing the whoa-is me jam of the week, starring complaints of her $450 check…be thankful for what you have. It may not be the highly exaggerated funds that a twinklet makes but it’s a hell of a lot more than what that homeless man/woman on the street may have, way more than student that had to drop out of college this semester b/c he/she couldn’t afford housing or books and even more than the women who want to leave but just feel that they can’t. You, my friend, still have your dignity.
Think about it…
PS: before you say it, I know…hurry up and release the book.
I have to say, I enjoy reading your tweets and watching your youtube vids, but this by far is my favorite. I hold the belief that the trials we go through in life are not in vain. I think we go through situations to help those going through the same thing or prevent them from going down that road altogether. Thanks for being an “open book” about your past because it most definitely can affect someone’s future in a positive way
I’m glad that someone will speak out and be honest about how this thing really is. This is what people need to hear whether they want to or not. I’m sure that there are people in the industry who pretend to turn a deaf ear to you but are still affected by what you say.
U are so on point!I’m glad ur shining a light on this.I pray ur words continue to sway girls away from that industry
I’m so proud of you. It’s your ability to grow and be well-rounded that makes you an amazing person in our world. I will link to this blog on my site!
Love you
You really should consider writing a book. You managed to get out of the industry and u may be able to help another female get out as well.
Jia God didn’t give u the strength to walk away from what u were doing to forget about it or even sit in a corner and never speak on it again.
Nor did He give u an articulate voice to NOT voice ur story to the world!
You were never ashamed of ur past don’t be ashamed or afraid of ur future!
Love u girl! ~T.
Now matter what anyone says you are a star and your star power shines brighter and is farther reaching than even you can image.
Continue being great!
Good post Jia!
Go
I am usually not a heavy blog reader but your honesty, openess and thoughtful expression of the painful truth is definitely something that I enjoy and look forward to reading from time to time. This blog, once again, is one of them.
keep up the good work, and take your time, but get that book out!
This is one of the most heartfelt pleas I’ve read from you. Thank you for speaking against that industry. No one realizes or wants to acknowlege the utter pain and abuse associated with that industry. Some will get to hear it from a beautiful woman like you that didn’t allow it to suck your life dry. Keep pushing to help others avoid it and keep pulling folks out of there. Bless you.
This was a good read. But I like porn by watching it I’m basically living my fantasies through them.
I must say that it is about time someone said what was really real with the porn business. I always knew it was impossible for all these ppl in the biz to be so into sex that they have to do it for a living. I have watched movies and have seen some of the eyes of the women and it seems so empty, like there is nothing there and they are just putting up a front in order to get through it. I wish that more women realize that the price of your soul is not worth that check you get. I dont knock or judge anyone who does or did porn but to me it isnt worth it in the end..
Wow!!! I never read your blog but I have seen your youtube videos, tweets and entertainment website…In everything I have seen you always keep it real but seeing this opens up another side of you and you are keeping it real on so many levels. I appreciate you sharing yourself with us and I learn. You are truly a special person and Thank you for bringing everyone Truth….so many people sugarcoat things but you simply put it out there and thats what most of us need, someone to keep it 100…May God bless you in all you do and Thank you!!!!
i love you.
yasss, I love this entry! Not because it’s about the industry, but because you told it straight up and let everyone know “all things that glitter, ain’t gold.” So proud of you for this!
Girl, thank you for this. I see this all too often in the gay community and while I do agree it is a win/win situation for straight men in porn, gay men seem to be in the same boat as straight women. I have a friend from Atlanta who starred in a couple of amateur flicks to pay his rent and now he’s got a package he can’t return. It aint worth it.
ive told u a million times already..u sure are for me..and yes..i luv the shit outa u [no pause]..everything u say..im totally in sync with..and aside from the rants..you sit and blog/tweet facts..not only for the sake of ranting aka venting..but to teach those who need it..preach jia..
xoxo
i follow your tweets & subscribe to your YouTube & visit your website. i cannot wait for your book. you`re the realest out there. people will do anything for money, but at the end of the day, it isn`t even worth it because once you make that tape, it`ll be out there for forever, & ppl will try to keep you in the same place for the rest of your life. it`s good that you`re trying to help people out of their situation. i really respect it.
Applause! It’s time to shut down the road to Delusionalville once and for all!
thanks for sharing your thoughts miss jia,i enjoy reading your tweets and blogs so much,keep up the good work….sending you love all the way from italy!
I am not gon’ lie but when I was 17 I told myself when I turned 18 that I would join the porn industry, at that time I was naive so I just didn’t think about it but all I did was think about the money flow and how easy it is all you gotta do is have sex, and thinking off all the so called “glamour” not even thinking about my dignity, I definitly commend you Jia for sharing that part of your life I think this will definitely help a lot of young people men/women to maybe just rethink getting into the porn industry! Luv ya! ~jAy~
Hello Miss Jia I am a fan and a follower of yours. From the time I was eighteen on I had led a lifestyle of drugs and everything that comes along with it. My choice because I knew right from wrong. Did I enjoy it? no , I think after a while I just excepted it. Well twelve years ago I got tired of being tired and I have been clean and sober with a family married to the very person I started getting high with.
So when people say you can’t change( because there is always somebody hating) we are living proof that you can change. I always wonder why did God chose me out of all the other girls he could have picked and my husbands says “because He knew you would tell somebody”. Thank you for letting me share.God is good!!!!
…Release the book. Get on Tyra SERIOUSLY. A lot of young girls need to hear your message.
Jia, I admire what you do. I follow your blogs, tweets and youtube. You are gifted, and I appreciate you. All your comments are so sweet! *tear*
Your opinion is very well put however, it sounds very one sided Jia but that’s probably because you have been in the industry. Ummmmm…..do you think/believe that everyone in the industry is unhappy deep down inside? Do you think its possible for somene to genuinely enjoy doing porn? You have totally grabbed me with this one. I LOVE IT!
This is the blog I tried to get you to write for Globalgrind. Great peice I’m glad you got this off your chest. Awesome post.
Great again Jia…I told you that you are a amazing person,Bless you in what ever you touch in life! ~LaShunda
@KeshiaTime: It IS onesided. Very much so. You see, I can’t speak for everyone in porn b/c I didn’t have the opportunity to meet everybody. I can’t talk about everybody’s experiences b/c I didn’t go through what they went through. I can only speak from what I’ve seen with my own eyes…and the girls that “I” met PLUS my own experience shows me a lot of unhappiness. As someone previously stated, you can see it in their eyes. You could see it in my eyes. I’m sure that there are some happy chicks roaming about the business but I’d be willing to bet that that’s few and far between. It’s definitely NOT a lot. They’d argue with me. I’d argue back for a moment…but it’s a lost cause.
This blog is for the chick that’s on the fence right now. She’s thinking about it but she just needed that one whisper in her ear begging her not to. Hell, learn from me and what “I” had to…HAVE to go through. And they’d quickly see that porn is not where its at.
Thank you everyone for your comments.
You r right, LOve your blogs by the way. I have not done porn but I have been around a lot of woman. I think if you look in side of a person you still can see the pain of being unhappy. I have a lot of respect for you. I think I have looked at all of your youtube vids. Past is what it is behind us. We live here and forward. I hope that this will reach that girl before she do something that will break her. Keep doing what you r doing. Ty
Secretly I lovvvee your blogs &tweets. You are intelligent n funny @ the same time. You shined some light on me about the porn industry and the misconceptions I knew.thank you. I will have to think twice now the next time I decide to watch a porno…
P.S. suckz when u don’t reply 2 my tweets but I’m still cool enough to leave a comment.no prob
I always enjoy reading your posts and love the fact that someone felt compelled to create a site like Project New Era (for us). Keep doing what you’re doing Jia!
[...] Porn is NOT the Answer……She So Fly [...]
So cool of you to share. I have a family member in that industry. She has had opportunities with some of her clients to get out but she always goes back. Thanks for sharing
Thanks for responding. I see what you are saying. I think it’s interesting where you’ve been and where you are now. This is the 1st time I ever heard you really talk about the industry with any detail so I’m intrigued by your honesty & openness, not that you aren’t like that any other time, but this one was very well put……but anyways I feel ya.
I’ve read your blogs since you had the old page in the pre-Valley days. I’ve always loved how you’ve been true to yourself. To be able to express one’s self, honestly and without shame, is a beautiful thing. With you, there is no facade, and it makes you even more beautiful. I love reading your stuff, so WHEN that book comes out, make sure you bless us all with the info on how to get our hands on it. God bless and Godspeed
I applaud you Jia, this post may open the eyes of a lot of young women.
I’m not a fan, have only viewed a few and they thoroughly disgust me…
why? Because they are beyond misogynistic…all about pleasing the man…all about the man getting his…
and I’ve have a stripper friend or two, and the the lifestyle makes you…not the other way around.
this was a pretty good read missJia..the porn industry really is hilariously horrible..even when it comes to the casts in them.
WOW!!! this was powerfull. What a good read. To be honest I have seen some of your movies and to me you looked very distant while in them. You make alot of since. Thier are so many other healthy ways to earn a living. I wish you well. Take care.
i’m glad you have given this topic some light, both here AND on youtube. i’m in the strip game, and i work with a few girls that are in the porn business…some glamorize it…some deny it all together. one girl i work with can’t even be sober at the strip club for more than an hour per night…but she want’s us all to believe that you’re sooo happy and excited to be fucking on film when you have to self-medicate in order to get through an 8 hour ass shaking shift? i’m not buying it…
thank you so much for sharing… this is a very good read as well as good insight.
Amen!
The pornography “business” is not at all glamorous.
I worked security for many years in “gentlemens clubs” and have known many women who delved into “flicks”, none were happy with it.
I knew a girl who would dose herself with GHB by the capful just to do her thing and work.
As far as the porn actors, I have been told by a friend of my brother who is a fairly big name in porn (who herself is infected with Herpes) that most of the men in the industry have the Herpes, and it is widespread..She schedules her cycles of medication so that it gives her 3 weeks out of the month to work.
There is nothing at all glamorous or healthy about porn.
I am glad u are keeping it real for these folks.
Not too many people will admit to what really goes on in the game.
Wow Jia this is on point opened my eyes. You said it all