It’s that time again. Over the past two weeks or so, I’ve seen a lot. I can’t say that I’ve “learned” a lot because much of the things that have taken place were nothing more than lessons revisited. These are things that I either learned on my own or through my parents and somehow disregarded them. Never again. Seriously. I’m too old to be playing nappy headed reindeer games with some of you people.

–making important decisions in your life based off current emotions is never the move (especially as it pertains to business)

–although your situation may have called for one thing, don’t assume that someone else in the same situation is practicing the same as you. Allow me to provide an example. Back in 2004, I had a guy that I was dating and we ultimately (and quickly) moved in with one another. After a while, he got on my nerves, we fought every day and NOTHING could fix our situation. We were basically living in the same house, not touching one another or speaking. Although I STILL didn’t sleep with anyone else or invite anyone to the house, I still (at THAT time) felt that it was okay to get to know other people. I was single and just happened to have my ex as a room mate. Even though this was MY story, that doesn’t mean that if someone else is in the same predicament they are living the exact same way as you did. You may have been broken up and holding to that but another person might still be fucking their “room mate” and ultimately lying to you. Just an example….

–business doesn’t mix with friendships

–everybody is NOT your friend.

–you can spend a lifetime being one of the most loyal, most trustworthy people I know. But in the blink of an eye, one false move can land you on the other side of the fence with me. No matter how much “good” you’ve done, if you do something bad enough, I can (and will) completely dismiss the good.

–everybody is not the same type of friend you are.

–don’t judge other’s because of the aforementioned.

–just because you feel comfortable with a situation doesn’t mean your ‘friends’ should know just how comfortable you are. My parents have taught me since I was a tot that no matter how close you are with someone, it doesn’t mean you have to spill EVERYTHING. Sharing is good but some stuff, you keep to yourself.

–sometimes it is safe (and best) to simply let go.

–it doesn’t matter what you were in my life this time several years ago, if you don’t continue enhancing the quality of my life with the direction I’m going, it’s okay for me to keep you at a distance. Expounding just a bit…with everything, there IS growth. Some people will continue to grow with you while others outgrow you. If it’s overgrown, distancing yourself is not a bad idea.

–you should do unto others as you’d like reciprocated but not so much that you create an unpleasant space for you.

–you’re never too grown to admit when you’re wrong.

–saying sorry IS an option

–going against your own principles for acceptance gets you nowhere but butt hurt in the end

–there’s nothing wrong with fine tuning your moral compass

–team work usually involves a team

–I ain’t perfect. Nobody walking this earth’s surface is. But girlfriend, work with the kid. (had to lighten it up b/c clearly I don’t think that I am perfect and don’t want to come across as being self righteous)

–showing me once that you don’t have my back only further shows me why I shouldn’t have yours

–”family” business should remain as such; there’s NO reason why the masses should know about my dealings before I do

….still growing so I’ll be adding much more.

2 Comments on Revisited

  1. SincerelyGo
    10/14/2010 at 1:17 am (4 years ago)

    Good post Jia, I feel ya. I’ve kept friends that have been disloyal to me at least once. It’s a hard pill to swallow. But I do look at things in a different light. Some people are toxic and just have to be cut off completely. I guess it’s our job to decipher between the good and the bad. Hugs. Good luck on that.


  2. Samantha
    10/21/2010 at 10:49 pm (4 years ago)

    I fell like I am a day late and dollar short but I really am digging this. I am currently going through a situation where I am in limbo of keepin a friendship or giving it distance and you have given me some things to consider with my decision.

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